http://youtube.com/watch?v=Zi2LoWPImZE
These girls sum up my feelings, exactly. Oh, and don't forget to mark rstanis2's and BCheron's comments as spam. :) (Especially rstanis2, the "scared shitless" little man-look at him go! From dating Asian, to living in Asia, to going to a college supposedly "full of Asians". I doubt the first two, but the third might be true, cause it sounds more personal.)
Before I go on, I would just like to say this: It's ok to like Asian culture (ie. you generally respect it and find it interesting in a non-aesthetic way.); liking it doesn't automatically categorize you as racist. Let's get that clear. And now, I go on.
However, to actually generalize a whole race and call other people who don't fit in to the stereotypes as "fakies", is fucked up. To actually go around looking for _(insert race)_ Women/Men, because you think they're more "________" than _(insert other race here)_ Women/Men means that there is a serious problem in the way you view people in general. To actually go to Asia and try to assimilate into the culture only because you watched anime, etc. is pathetic and insulting. Fantasizing about her/him by the color of their skin/where they come from/what they look like/more superficiality=isolating their individuality.
To assume that a culture of one country or nation dominates the mindsets of EVERY person from that country, is just stupid and generalizing. Why? There are MANY cultures in a country, not just one! For example, it's wrong to think that all Americans are hillbillies/spoiled/"Fuck Other Countries!" Nationalists/rich/liberated/etc. There are many exceptions, various cultures and different mindsets. And just because you dated a few Asian girls who were "submissive and small" (to the people who claim it, I doubt it highly. See "Colleen Kelly" for reference) and live in the part of Asia closest to the "sex district", doesn't make you an expert on Asians. That's like saying Britney Spears and Paris Hilton is every White woman. (More examples of racist sexism welcome, for me to expose)
9 comments:
So true! I grew up surrounded by guys who thought that way and it drove me nuts (partly because of jealousy, but I'm glad to see someone on the receiving end gets just as irritated).
hello! thanks for this post! i'm LOVING the poetry. it rocks!
i'm drawing an illustration called "Angry Asian Women" cos there are already a lot of cute, underdressed asian women around.. it's for my zine, "The second i scream".. and came across your blog seeing what else was out there. if you're interested, pls get in touch - it'll be ready soon! it's for sale or i can email you the pic for inspiration!
if you like, please check out some feminist altered posters here:
http://www.squidishere.com/grand_theft_scum.html
ANGRY ASIAN WOMEN RULE!
rstanis2 2008
I am rstanis2 from 2008.
I don't tell lies. I dated a Filipino woman from La Union, Philippines in 2003-2006. I took a plane to be with her, thus I dated an Asian woman and traveled in her country. She wasn't what I expected, and I believe I was not what she expected. I did not "rape" her the first chance I got. I was never aggressive in that area. It's wrong though to find some Asian women attractive? Asian women don't lust?- don't lust at Caucasian men? You know, she is now married to a Caucasian-American man. One who is more established in terms of money than me. So, will you create a blog putting down lower middle class women who marry above middle class men? I will say she is not "that sort" of woman though, and I am not "that sort" of man. I believe she does naturally love the man she married.
Second, I worked as an English Instructor for all of 2009 in Jeonju, South Korea. When the economy collapsed I not only wanted a job, I wanted to live and work in a foreign country, to become a real foreigner. It also was not what I expected, the job or the country, but I found some joy in certain places. One woman almost fell in love with me there, and another one had a secret crush on me that I didn't know until I was packing up to conclude my year. The latter I would have liked to have known. She seemed sweet and quiet. ( .. = Asian women, my type. A generalization. Oh well. That’s what I think, and it’s a compliment. Being sweet and quiet is a compliment. Quiet isn’t submissive. Quiet is secretly romantic and contemplating your ideas. A little shy. Shy can be cute. Vs. in your face- “Get out of your Asiaphile white dude from America. You pervert with a hard-on! I’m not some doll of yours.”)
I liked the idea of an Asian wife not for submission. When I went to the Phlippines it was my first time outside of America. The land was gorgeous, the people were poor and smiled at me. The children didn't smile with hands out for money. It was pure. It was something I never experienced before. It was what I wanted and what I imagined. Just that the girlfriend I had, wanted to leave all that and become modern, graduate-degree level education, nice house, furniture, clothes... to move up in life. I understand. You lose part of yourself and sweetness when you do this though, usually at least..
Unlike the people I met on my walks around her town (usually by myself as if she was embarrassed to accompany me??) who would smile at me and strike up a conversation, she talked to me, but not as much as I needed. Also if you don't smile at me, I think you don't like me. She wasn't a smiling Asian girl. I thought she didn't like me. It was just her natural disposition. She's not a bad person for it. I'm naturally more on the depressing side, so I wanted a soulmate to counter that. Opposites attract..science right? So I wanted someone with a happy disposition. When I am sweet to you, and only you, I want sweetness back. I didn't get that. And I'm not talking sexual here either. I'm talking more simple things.
Honesty is a big one. I felt it lacked that. Did she really want me, or did she want a new life away from where she came from. You'll never find such a warmth and friendliness of the people and sharing, caring attitude mixed with the natural beauty of the countryside if you leave...but no one cares about those things, except me.
Likely we would have lived in America of course, still though.
I wanted a traditional girl. Doesn't mean she can't be educated. She would rather watch an imported, Korean soap opera that go for a walk with me. That memory burns deep as to why I needed to end the relationship. She likes movies I didn't like for specific reasons, the movies had themes of vanity, lust (i have enough of that, I don't need more), greed, mixed religious messages (she was catholic as I, but yet I need someone at least as strong as me in the faith, and I wondered if she might the type of person who stops attending church and caring about God as she got older and successful.) She seemed more democratic/liberal in her ideas, movies books, social justice responses, (she might even be like you...pro choice, though I doubt that. Then it would be good that it ended. Pro-choice is not something I think is good for society. )where I'm...a weirdo. I may be more republican, yet I choose not to vote. In helping the poor, we had different responses as to how to address that.
I wanted someone who wasn't aware of western culture (as much as America at least). Many things about Modern western culture I disagree with, which republicans would say i'm a socialist who hates his country and culture. Well, I like the old traditional ways of american culture. Things today I don't like. Consumerism I don't like, but I don't like Gay marriage either. So split the different, which camp am I in? I can't decide.
After seeing Korea and Philippines I saw the urban areas are full of consumerism and appeal to western culture's ideas. I got disgusted. The countryside represents my sanctuary from that.
I wanted a woman who was still a woman. It's more likely to find a sweet, feminine woman in Asia than America, wouldn't you say? Someone who would stay home with the kids and actually be fulfilled with that! Not complaining that raising children isn't a job. She can work if she wants. In America though, it’s now mandatory for both parents to work to support this expensive country, and countless products we “need” to have to be “happy.” Not a woman who wanted to join in live combat in the military. Not someone who found fulfillment in working extra hours for more money, but going for a ride with me on a motorcycle somewhere. Someone who would want to learn to ride a motorcycle. Not someone swearing at me that I'm a pervert because I'm attracted to certain physical features her enthnicity has more of, or attracted to her personality/disposition. I honestly found much more women in the philppines with pleasant dispositions. I can tell how friendly a person is. Philippines ranks highest on my list so far. They don't get on a camera and curse you out (try manila or any crowded city of unhappiness for that)
You could analyze me and say for the fact that I was on my own a lot in life, was turned down the first American girl I thought was very beautiful, disliked the consumerism of my age, disliked the schoolmates I had, disliked the lack of spirituality of the country I was born in, I wanted to find another country of other people. I wanted to find love not in my home country since I felt little connection of friendship to the people I grew up around. (Maybe I just need to change my state or region of the country and find nicer people. But there’s something in America that makes us how we are. And there is something beautiful in certain Asian countries that make it what it is.)
People say I was wrong to go to Korea with expectation of how I thought it would be, so I’m wrong to do the same with that girlfriend from the past. Yes, but I know what I need. I can’t live with someone who is too quiet to me and seems unhappy or worse… moody. That’s a dangerous word. I can’t live with a moody girl. I have enough moodiness for the two of us. I didn’t know who she really was until the letters came to life and I met her.
She was not submissive. The first time I put my arm around her she shrugged if off and my face went red. I felt like I had to ask to kiss her, and even in private. Of course you don’t kiss in public there, especially when you are not married. And I RESPECT that, and that culture. Yes I’m Generalizing the culture. GENERALIZING. Better go call up Obama and arrest me. Call the Bigot Patrol, we got ourselves a big one here! I really don’t care. I’ve been called named and it gets easier the more they do it. I respected that. I respected that she wouldn’t wear shorts because she didn’t want guys lusting at her legs. Yet other things about her ideas didn’t line up, or didn’t match how I thought they should line up. I’m a fair person with common sense ideas here. Traditional ideas. I’m not the one trying to radically change social mores. I believe you are.
She was not small. She was 5’5’’ and a half. She had one hell of a mean look when she didn’t like something you were doing. And her “ignoring you” would turn your heart into ice and anxiety.
In comparison, the Asian girl who fell in love with me, briefly, in Korea, well she was a completely different sort of person. I understand not all Asian people are the same. But generalization are not all bad, is what I believe. I like it when people BREAK the generalization and you’re surprised. When I had my ponytail people thought I smoked weed and supported Liberal politics. Nothing could be further from the truth. I, myself get generalized. In my own college when I was a senior an Indian student was astonished that he found an American male who did not have a girlfriend! He couldn’t shut up about it. Was I mad? Did I kick him hard for generalizing that all white American men have libidos sky high that can only be satisfied by sleeping with their girlfriend, or any random girl? No! I was happy he generalized me in a wrong way and I was able to show him that I’m not like that. It made me feel proud of myself not going with the negative trend of my culture. (having a girlfriend is not negative, but he was implying a sexual/promiscuous reference there.) And my pride is bad. That girlfriend who bring that up how proud I am of myself and judgmental of her . I was pointing out the nice things I did in our relationship that I only brought up to show her how I tried, and then gave examples of how she made me feel cold and ugly by what she did. Call it judgment and pride, but it’s the facts. It’s the facts and why we broke up. Not because she wasn’t hot enough.
To actually go around looking for _(insert race)_ Women/Men, because you think they're more "________" than _(insert other race here)_ Women/Men means that there is a serious problem in the way you view people in general.
Well, I went around looking for a Filipina (though I think all South East Asian countries have people who are friendly, more friendly than other places. The women are nice to foreign men, and it doesn’t lead to sexual advances. I went to the Philippines again in 2009 on my own and with no intention of meeting anyone, just a week vacation. I met a woman and we went to a zoo with her family. She was friendly and had a certain smile I’ve been searching for. But she didn’t come to my bed. It wasn’t like that. She walked me to the airport and unexpectantly did the nicest thing I’ve been yearning for all my life, kissed me on the cheek. You just don’t get that sort of pure romance anymore, Anywhere! Not even in movies. It’s a ll bump & grind, and abortion. An unexpected kiss on the cheek from a happy woman is indescribable. I had been feeling truly depressed and lonely before the trip so maybe that was why too. There was something I connected with in the innocent kiss.
So if an American woman can give me a such a kiss as that, then I’m butter, but I found it with an Asian woman. It’s my private generalization. A positive generalization. She was the only one I had that response to that, and no one else did that. She maybe it’s not her being Asian, just her being herself. Well herself is wonderful. American women are not out of the equation. But I think our culture has ruined the kindness American woman used to show. I have to go somewhere far away to see a different culture where people grow up differently and socialize and compete and work and talk and love differently. The seeds planted in America I don’t really know if they are becoming like a bad crop.
No one goes to America for romance. Philippines, perhaps (for me). America, no. You come here to make money. To get divorced. To become…oh not that word again, “Liberated.” To join the military and have them pay for your degree and assist in car and home ownership. To join other women and yell about inequalities that all men are responsible for. Is that a generalization?
It’s a multi-layered idea with why I’m attracted to certain Asian women. At the check out line, again there was who looked like a Vietnamese women (I like identifying characteristics and guessing which country it is. Very subtle…yet they do the same to us! He’s Canadian, no He’s British, no he has a ponytail, he’s Australian….are you from California? Do you know Madonna? Hey, have you ever met Obama? You have a big nose, you are American. ) The lady at the line was so polite to the cashier and had this smile on her face as if life is okay, life is pleasant. If you’ve lived in America long enough you might see that while you have money, it’s never “enough” and you’d never use the word pleasant to describe your life. Either that woman and her culture hides their stress, or her culture taught her to release stress, or her culture doesn’t have the same competitiveness and stressors as America does. I wanted a wonderful person to share my life and home. Not Mrs. Mean. Not a crab apple. I need her to change my crabbiness. And she could. It’s been done to me before where I’m pissed off and a woman says one thing or gives me a certain look, and I’m back to thinking life is okay and I’m happy. It is possible with the right person, a soulmate perhaps. Maybe she’s not Asian, but she has a personality stereotypically thought of that an asian woman might have, that she inherited from Her Old Traditional CULTURE in that old country. America is a new country with a constant ebb and flow of people and new progressive politics that lends itself to infinity arguments and people sleeping on their toes and adults and children never seeing eye to eye. Instability.
She would never type the way you do. You’re angry. You seem mean. You don’t have a traditional mind. Where you born in Asia? I think not. Then you’re only part Asian. It’s like saying I’m Polish. Was I born there? Then how could I really say I am? By the way, Native Polish women…yes they are nice. Nice in appearance and disposition, just like Asian women. They come to America and maybe they sleep with their boyfriend and wear skimpy clothes and only date the Pole with the BMW or Mercedes…but in their old country, their homeland, they don’t do this crap. They act nice, they wear good clothes, they aren’t as materialistic.
Again, it’s something about new American popular culture. I don’t follow it. No one dates me either. I can find someone nice, what I’m looking for, maybe Asia, maybe Poland, maybe Mexico. Wish me luck.
To actually go to Asia and try to assimilate into the culture only because you watched anime, etc. is pathetic and insulting. Fantasizing about her/him by the color of their skin/where they come from/what they look like/more superficiality=isolating their individuality.
I agree with you. I shouldn’t fantasize about her darker skin color, or think darker skin means more “authentic.” But It means traditional-ness to me.(darker people work in the field, lighter colored Asians are the university ones who have snobbish attitudes and parents who have money. They are spoiled and would bully me. (generalizations? You bet. Are they always true, of course not. It’s up to you to beat the generalization though. I like the challenge, don’t you? More like my observations of life. Prove me wrong and I’ll say okay I’m wrong and you are right, you beat the generalization and are a good person for it. I’m glad you’ve not fallen in line with the bad ones of your type) Someone who works by their hands and not only their degrees and keeping their hands clean. I want someone who doesn’t think manual labor is bad, dirty, wrong, poor, stupid.
I'm not a little man. I'm 5'10''. but what does my height have anything to do with..well anything? Scared shitless? I'm more unhappy that those women in the video turned themselves into this. Screaming, for what purpose? Scream at the person who made you that way. When you do it to me it makes me feel like I did you a wrong, and I haven't.
I imagine a world of dystopia where poorness and a simple smile and virtues are replaced with material prosperity but people are miserable in spirit. Where those filipino women I saw in the countryside all live in cramped modern apartments and cement is below their feet. where condoms are the craze and they have no real lifelong partner. where life everyday is a screaming match with your enemy. and everyone is your enemy. give all the poor kids a new pair of Nikes and everything will be okay. give all the women in full clothing some yoga spandex pants, a sexy haircut, breast implants, butt implants, tighter jeans with little cut in the hip region, Cialis pills, a mid-driff,some eyeliner and sexy eye shadow. redder lips, sexy perfume, a prada bag, high heels to make their butt stick out, and then as soon as a male notices (which they will since the sex center in the pituary gland is 3 times bigger in male mammals than female mammals..men have a greater ability to lust) and says something inappropriate and lustful, assemble your crew and beat him down verbally! get on youtube social media and let the world know you are sick of it. you can dress however you want. hek, you should be allowed to go topless as it's legal in time sqaure to do so. get all you rights, yell for them. and then when men stare at you, yell even louder. (it'll happen to Arabic women soon enough, it's already happening. Their old personalities, ways, virtues, spirituality in daily life, dialogues, styles, everything. it'll become westernized..sexified..exactly what Islam is not for. What's the point of covering your wrists, ankles, hair and face, when you are wearing spandex tight yoga pants that show the exact shape of your butt? Do not understand what Islam made rules for female AND make dress? Loose flowing clothing. Nothing form fitting. Do you not get it? It's to discourage lust from either gender. To encourage modesty. Woman's body is protected from the glances of other men. Only her man gets to see it. More and more Muslim women around me don't get this or don't care. Even in Arabia I think it's changing. Everything is form fitting now, and it's against the spirit of..well, every good religion. You follow style of you follow God? It is serious. Men are weak to lust. They still will go to jail, but you could, could, dress better.)
but look back, just look back for one moment as i have you remember your old country, the homeland, and look at all that has left you.
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